Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
survival.
so its 1:21am right now, and i drank a whole cup of coffee an hour ago so i would be able to stay up late and watch the georgia v. boise state game. we just found out that the espn here is out of south africa, so they are showing some riveting tennis matches instead of american college football. i guess ill stay up for a few more hours...
i just put up a long video on facebook, but i realize that some of you dont have facebook, so i am hoping that ben will be able to upload that video on to here sometime soon...
there is a lot of time to think on this ship. pretty much anywhere you sit, you can just stare out a window at either lush, green mountains, or an ever rolling ocean (not so lush, and full of dead cats and trash....along the coast anyway...), or a wonderful combination of the two. so whenever you sit down and stare out a window or go on the top deck and sit down, you are bound to eventually get lost in your thoughts after you have sat there for long enough. so i am cosntantly having hundreds of thoughts going through my head every day that i am processing (never resolving, just processing), things that i have rarely ever really had to think about, if ever. here's the processing thought of the day. matt and stacy, you will understand this i think :)
it is extremely difficult to be a white man in africa (or in any country that is in great need, really...). yes, they can spot a mercy shipper from a hundred yards away (even in the middle of no where in a village, they know us and have heard of us). they know we are here to help, and they are so thankful for what we do for them, their friends, and their country. the problem isnt that they arent thankful for it or dont appreciate it, it is that it has been engrained in them that if they see a white person, they are rich. if they are rich, try to be their friend. if they agree to being your friend, you will not only have another friend, but more importantly you will have a friend who can buy your family food, or pay for a car repair, or pay for your school books, or fund a new building for your church, or the jackpot, marry you and give you the golden ticket to america where life is perfect and obama walks door to door and hands out buckets of money to everyone...which he does. but thats not the point. the point is that this culture revolves around survival. not by choice, but because they have to. knowing a white man = an opportunity for better survival.
for someone who doesnt really know any better, you would come to west africa and be able to make 57 of the best friends you have ever had in a matter of hours. you wouldnt be able to write your email and phone number down fast enough. the problem is that if you answer "yes" to the question, "are you my friend?" they are expecting that you truly mean that, which means you will help them. i wish i could buy them new shoes, and i wish that they werent so hungry, and i wish that they didnt have to work 16 hour days to make 5 bucks, and i wish that they had money to pay for all their kids to school, and i wish they didnt have to live their whole life with parasites because they have no way to get rid of them. i really wish i could help them, but as truly hard as it is to accept, i do not want to do missions so i can rescue every single needy individual from the situations that they are in. i want to do missions so i can give living water to these people so that they will never have to be thirsty again. Peter and John understood this pretty well, like in Acts 3 at the gate called Beautiful. you probably know the story. this crippled man was in great need, begging at this gate near the temple every single day. anyone who had a shred of compassion had probably given him money or food or water at some point, but still at the beginning of every day he had the same problem. Peter and John were able to see past the immediate physical needs...yes they healed him, but after their interaction, that man who was once a crippled beggar, became a man who knew Jesus, and he became a testimony to all who saw him of who Jesus was. it was nothing that they did in their own power. They did not change that man's heart. it was the fact that they were filled with the Holy Spirit, they loved Jesus, and they allowed themselves to simply be available to be used. that was it.
so (continuing with this thought) today some friends and I decided to go to the beach for some relaxation time. it was a great day, beautiful weather, no rain (finally). i got toasted, and i drank a cold coke in a glass bottle. get in my mouth. there was no room in the mercy ships land rover on the way home, and i was feeling a little adventurous, so i decided to make the 2 hour trip back from the village to the ship by myself. i figured if i can hitch hike 900 miles in america in 2 days, i can make it back to the ship by dark. so i started walking, and very quickly got picked up by a man on a moto. "how much to aberdeen?" i asked. "oooh, abadin...." he looks down for a second. "you go 70,000 leones." (about 3 to 4 times what a local would pay, there was no way...). "whaaat? I no JC (just come), i live here! give me fair price." back and forth, back and forth, till he came down to 30,000, which is about 7 dollars for an hour + ride. we talked the entire way to aberdeen. he told me was a christian (before i told him i was from mercy ships), in theology school and is trying to get sponsored to go to seminary in America. i tested the waters a little bit, and asked him how he came to know Jesus. explained how his father was an Imam, so he grew up Muslim, and his friend invited him to church when he was 19 and he heard a sermon about the great commission (he knew the book, chapter, and verses), and he had never known that Jesus actually died for every single person on earth. not just for christians, but for Muslims and every human that ever lived. it changed his life. but the first words out of his mouth when i asked him what started the change, was simply "love." he said, "my friend loved me. he loved me enough to truly be my friend, and invited me to church. he did not change my heart though- the Holy Spirit is the only one that can do that. if it had not been for my friend's love though, i dont know if i would have ever walked into church and come to know Jesus." i was listening intently at that point, while holding on for dear life to his bike at the same time...
i went on talking with him about how frustrating it is to be a white man really trying to love people here, but it just seems like all they want is my money or to somehow take advantage of me. i wished they thought i was black. he chuckled kindly, like he knew exactly what i was talking about. he was able to explain to me from the perspective of someone who had literally JUST tried to rip me off how many Africans view white people as a ticket out of whatever situation they are in, or atleast a way to make a couple extra bucks. he went on to encourage me with a simple, but such a good to hear message, "james, it is not your responsibility to change the hearts of the sierra leonean people. that is for the Holy Spirit to do. God has called you to love, and that is what you must do." i cant make these people think that i am black, or that i am poor, but i sure as heck can love them. the man's name was joseph, and we prayed for each other at the end of our ride. it was a gift.
i just put up a long video on facebook, but i realize that some of you dont have facebook, so i am hoping that ben will be able to upload that video on to here sometime soon...
there is a lot of time to think on this ship. pretty much anywhere you sit, you can just stare out a window at either lush, green mountains, or an ever rolling ocean (not so lush, and full of dead cats and trash....along the coast anyway...), or a wonderful combination of the two. so whenever you sit down and stare out a window or go on the top deck and sit down, you are bound to eventually get lost in your thoughts after you have sat there for long enough. so i am cosntantly having hundreds of thoughts going through my head every day that i am processing (never resolving, just processing), things that i have rarely ever really had to think about, if ever. here's the processing thought of the day. matt and stacy, you will understand this i think :)
it is extremely difficult to be a white man in africa (or in any country that is in great need, really...). yes, they can spot a mercy shipper from a hundred yards away (even in the middle of no where in a village, they know us and have heard of us). they know we are here to help, and they are so thankful for what we do for them, their friends, and their country. the problem isnt that they arent thankful for it or dont appreciate it, it is that it has been engrained in them that if they see a white person, they are rich. if they are rich, try to be their friend. if they agree to being your friend, you will not only have another friend, but more importantly you will have a friend who can buy your family food, or pay for a car repair, or pay for your school books, or fund a new building for your church, or the jackpot, marry you and give you the golden ticket to america where life is perfect and obama walks door to door and hands out buckets of money to everyone...which he does. but thats not the point. the point is that this culture revolves around survival. not by choice, but because they have to. knowing a white man = an opportunity for better survival.
for someone who doesnt really know any better, you would come to west africa and be able to make 57 of the best friends you have ever had in a matter of hours. you wouldnt be able to write your email and phone number down fast enough. the problem is that if you answer "yes" to the question, "are you my friend?" they are expecting that you truly mean that, which means you will help them. i wish i could buy them new shoes, and i wish that they werent so hungry, and i wish that they didnt have to work 16 hour days to make 5 bucks, and i wish that they had money to pay for all their kids to school, and i wish they didnt have to live their whole life with parasites because they have no way to get rid of them. i really wish i could help them, but as truly hard as it is to accept, i do not want to do missions so i can rescue every single needy individual from the situations that they are in. i want to do missions so i can give living water to these people so that they will never have to be thirsty again. Peter and John understood this pretty well, like in Acts 3 at the gate called Beautiful. you probably know the story. this crippled man was in great need, begging at this gate near the temple every single day. anyone who had a shred of compassion had probably given him money or food or water at some point, but still at the beginning of every day he had the same problem. Peter and John were able to see past the immediate physical needs...yes they healed him, but after their interaction, that man who was once a crippled beggar, became a man who knew Jesus, and he became a testimony to all who saw him of who Jesus was. it was nothing that they did in their own power. They did not change that man's heart. it was the fact that they were filled with the Holy Spirit, they loved Jesus, and they allowed themselves to simply be available to be used. that was it.
so (continuing with this thought) today some friends and I decided to go to the beach for some relaxation time. it was a great day, beautiful weather, no rain (finally). i got toasted, and i drank a cold coke in a glass bottle. get in my mouth. there was no room in the mercy ships land rover on the way home, and i was feeling a little adventurous, so i decided to make the 2 hour trip back from the village to the ship by myself. i figured if i can hitch hike 900 miles in america in 2 days, i can make it back to the ship by dark. so i started walking, and very quickly got picked up by a man on a moto. "how much to aberdeen?" i asked. "oooh, abadin...." he looks down for a second. "you go 70,000 leones." (about 3 to 4 times what a local would pay, there was no way...). "whaaat? I no JC (just come), i live here! give me fair price." back and forth, back and forth, till he came down to 30,000, which is about 7 dollars for an hour + ride. we talked the entire way to aberdeen. he told me was a christian (before i told him i was from mercy ships), in theology school and is trying to get sponsored to go to seminary in America. i tested the waters a little bit, and asked him how he came to know Jesus. explained how his father was an Imam, so he grew up Muslim, and his friend invited him to church when he was 19 and he heard a sermon about the great commission (he knew the book, chapter, and verses), and he had never known that Jesus actually died for every single person on earth. not just for christians, but for Muslims and every human that ever lived. it changed his life. but the first words out of his mouth when i asked him what started the change, was simply "love." he said, "my friend loved me. he loved me enough to truly be my friend, and invited me to church. he did not change my heart though- the Holy Spirit is the only one that can do that. if it had not been for my friend's love though, i dont know if i would have ever walked into church and come to know Jesus." i was listening intently at that point, while holding on for dear life to his bike at the same time...
i went on talking with him about how frustrating it is to be a white man really trying to love people here, but it just seems like all they want is my money or to somehow take advantage of me. i wished they thought i was black. he chuckled kindly, like he knew exactly what i was talking about. he was able to explain to me from the perspective of someone who had literally JUST tried to rip me off how many Africans view white people as a ticket out of whatever situation they are in, or atleast a way to make a couple extra bucks. he went on to encourage me with a simple, but such a good to hear message, "james, it is not your responsibility to change the hearts of the sierra leonean people. that is for the Holy Spirit to do. God has called you to love, and that is what you must do." i cant make these people think that i am black, or that i am poor, but i sure as heck can love them. the man's name was joseph, and we prayed for each other at the end of our ride. it was a gift.
it is not your job to change someone's heart.
never, ever underestimate the power or relevancy of the gospel. we were condemned to die, but because of love, Jesus came to our rescue.
oh, and i got back safe and sound :)
james
never, ever underestimate the power or relevancy of the gospel. we were condemned to die, but because of love, Jesus came to our rescue.
oh, and i got back safe and sound :)
james
Thursday, August 25, 2011
my heart is beeping.
before i get started i have a few things to get off of my chest (and since last post was a heavy and heart wrenching entry for me to type out, this one is going to be mostly pictures and nothing serious really...)
1. i forgot to take my doxycycline for the first 3 days i was here, but i didnt get any mosquito bites during that time, so holla.
2. ive forgotten to take my doxycycline for the last 3 days, and i can currently count 4 mosquito bites on my body. one is on my head. so im hoping to itch all the malaria out before it reaches my blood stream
3. i saw a shark, and no one believes me, so i would like to personally apologize to anna mozley, ashley ward, jordan karr, and emily smith for patronizing your shark story. i believe you. marie wasnt convinced it was a shark, so im not apologizing to her. but thanks for quoting me in your blog, i love you.
4. ive done insanity 3 times since ive been here, and i think ive done more pushups in the last week than i have in the last 4 years.
ok. so. the last week has been more than full of activities and adventures, so i figured i will give you a 1-2 picture snapshot of some of them...
here we go.
the men's prison: we weren't allowed to bring cameras, so theres no pictures. but it was AMAZING. i had the best time in the world. 9 of us went...2 americans, a south korean, ghanaian, australian, german, dominican republican, canadian, and one other place, but it was a while ago, and i cant remember. make up one. about 200 of the inmates piled into this little chapel in the prison and immediately the chorus leader just started yelling out a song, and everyone followed him clapping on the off beat. for like 45 minutes. these men worshipped and prayed like men who were truly in love with Jesus, they were so passionate and filled with joy. it was so fun. we danced a lot. then people got up and shared different messages and kind of tied scriptures together...my roomate michael brought the Word, and they all love him. he is awesome...here he is (he is also good friends with the mozley family, and spent a lot of time with them in ghana.)
and then we basically prayed for the guys for the rest of the time. they just walked up to us individually and sat down and began to tell their stories and about their families and what they needed prayer for and we got to know them a little better. it was such a good time of ministry and relationship building. i had a great time, and i cant wait to go back. it also smelled like death.
church: it was quite the adventure. we went to a church in waterloo about an hour away because michael had been asked to preach at a church there, so a small group of us went along with him. we got to experience the country side via public tansportation...it was quite the adventure. we crammed into a little van with about 15 other beautifully smelling sierra leoneans until they dropped us off outside the city on a dirt road, and we took the encata's (motorbikes) for the rest of the ride through the mountains and such. at a couple different points along the way i thought to myself, "my parents would probably be disappointed with this particular life choice", then got into/onto the motorized vehicle of choice. we made it safe and sound though :)
theres a little video of the end result of the trip on facebook. church was really good. 3 hours long. but good :)
the beach: the beaches here are probably the best beaches ive seen in my whole life. we had a little freetime, so we spent the afternoon at John Obey Beach. there was so much to explore, so much to take pictures of, and i got toasted. apparently malaria medication makes you get sunburned. good thing it always looks like i got tan.
(this is the beach we went to, but for some reason it wont let me upload my pictures from facebook, so i got them on google....) if youre friends with me on facebook, have at it.
aaand lets see. we went on a scouting mission in town because we really wanted ice cream one night, but no one could tell us where we could find it. luckily i have found some adventurous comrads who set out with me into town...really we just picked streets to walk down using eeny meeny miny mo, going through crazy markets, trying to remember which way we turned last, and being stared at by pretty much every person we passed. its really fun, because if you are a white person in freetown, there is a 95% chance you are from mercy ships, so the locals will yell "mercy chip! mery chip!" and the kids come up and grab our hands and say "elloooooo! elloooooo!, elloooooo!" about 37 times until they have been satisfied with the interaction. buncha cutie patooties.
after about 30 minutes of exploring, danielle spotted a little soft serve ice cream stand on the side of the street! i cant believe i didnt take a picture of it. we were victorious. i dont think ice cream has ever tasted so good in my life. i was so satisfied. like at the end of the last harry potter movie.
i have more pictures to upload, but my camera is down stairs and i cant currently move my legs. insanity was the worst invention ever....
i spent half my day at the hope center today with a boy named Osman. he just had his leg amputated and is still doing therapy and learning to function with one leg. he was the bravest 8 year old i have ever met. he told me that right before they cut his leg off, he said to his mother (who was a mess), "God is in control. it will be just fine." we played soccer for like 2 hours, and he seriously scored on me like 18 times. at first i wasnt really trying, and then i decided to go a little harder on him, and he still wooped me.
another boy told me the story of how he got all of his burns on his face. he had asked his aunt for money to get a drink on his way to school, and his aunt got angry at him because she thought he was trying to steal money from her. she began to yell at him and pushed him into the fire near their hut. his father saw her push him, so he killed her on the spot. he is in jail now, and the boy has burns all over his body. he is full of joy.
one of the day workers at the hope center told me about his experience during the war today. it was the first time that a local had really opened up to me about what actually personally happened to them so far. some of the things he shared with me are too grusome to share on here...but friends, let me tell you that most of us have no idea what kind of evil and tragedy has happened to the people here. i dont understand how these people have been able to rebuild and continued on with their lives. they have so much faith, and so much trust that God will provide and be their strength. i love that they dont just call him God here. it is always, "Papa God."
my heart is alive, and i am inspired daily by these people in my life.
1. i forgot to take my doxycycline for the first 3 days i was here, but i didnt get any mosquito bites during that time, so holla.
2. ive forgotten to take my doxycycline for the last 3 days, and i can currently count 4 mosquito bites on my body. one is on my head. so im hoping to itch all the malaria out before it reaches my blood stream
3. i saw a shark, and no one believes me, so i would like to personally apologize to anna mozley, ashley ward, jordan karr, and emily smith for patronizing your shark story. i believe you. marie wasnt convinced it was a shark, so im not apologizing to her. but thanks for quoting me in your blog, i love you.
4. ive done insanity 3 times since ive been here, and i think ive done more pushups in the last week than i have in the last 4 years.
ok. so. the last week has been more than full of activities and adventures, so i figured i will give you a 1-2 picture snapshot of some of them...
here we go.
the men's prison: we weren't allowed to bring cameras, so theres no pictures. but it was AMAZING. i had the best time in the world. 9 of us went...2 americans, a south korean, ghanaian, australian, german, dominican republican, canadian, and one other place, but it was a while ago, and i cant remember. make up one. about 200 of the inmates piled into this little chapel in the prison and immediately the chorus leader just started yelling out a song, and everyone followed him clapping on the off beat. for like 45 minutes. these men worshipped and prayed like men who were truly in love with Jesus, they were so passionate and filled with joy. it was so fun. we danced a lot. then people got up and shared different messages and kind of tied scriptures together...my roomate michael brought the Word, and they all love him. he is awesome...here he is (he is also good friends with the mozley family, and spent a lot of time with them in ghana.)
and then we basically prayed for the guys for the rest of the time. they just walked up to us individually and sat down and began to tell their stories and about their families and what they needed prayer for and we got to know them a little better. it was such a good time of ministry and relationship building. i had a great time, and i cant wait to go back. it also smelled like death.
church: it was quite the adventure. we went to a church in waterloo about an hour away because michael had been asked to preach at a church there, so a small group of us went along with him. we got to experience the country side via public tansportation...it was quite the adventure. we crammed into a little van with about 15 other beautifully smelling sierra leoneans until they dropped us off outside the city on a dirt road, and we took the encata's (motorbikes) for the rest of the ride through the mountains and such. at a couple different points along the way i thought to myself, "my parents would probably be disappointed with this particular life choice", then got into/onto the motorized vehicle of choice. we made it safe and sound though :)
theres a little video of the end result of the trip on facebook. church was really good. 3 hours long. but good :)
the beach: the beaches here are probably the best beaches ive seen in my whole life. we had a little freetime, so we spent the afternoon at John Obey Beach. there was so much to explore, so much to take pictures of, and i got toasted. apparently malaria medication makes you get sunburned. good thing it always looks like i got tan.
(this is the beach we went to, but for some reason it wont let me upload my pictures from facebook, so i got them on google....) if youre friends with me on facebook, have at it.
aaand lets see. we went on a scouting mission in town because we really wanted ice cream one night, but no one could tell us where we could find it. luckily i have found some adventurous comrads who set out with me into town...really we just picked streets to walk down using eeny meeny miny mo, going through crazy markets, trying to remember which way we turned last, and being stared at by pretty much every person we passed. its really fun, because if you are a white person in freetown, there is a 95% chance you are from mercy ships, so the locals will yell "mercy chip! mery chip!" and the kids come up and grab our hands and say "elloooooo! elloooooo!, elloooooo!" about 37 times until they have been satisfied with the interaction. buncha cutie patooties.
i have more pictures to upload, but my camera is down stairs and i cant currently move my legs. insanity was the worst invention ever....
i spent half my day at the hope center today with a boy named Osman. he just had his leg amputated and is still doing therapy and learning to function with one leg. he was the bravest 8 year old i have ever met. he told me that right before they cut his leg off, he said to his mother (who was a mess), "God is in control. it will be just fine." we played soccer for like 2 hours, and he seriously scored on me like 18 times. at first i wasnt really trying, and then i decided to go a little harder on him, and he still wooped me.
another boy told me the story of how he got all of his burns on his face. he had asked his aunt for money to get a drink on his way to school, and his aunt got angry at him because she thought he was trying to steal money from her. she began to yell at him and pushed him into the fire near their hut. his father saw her push him, so he killed her on the spot. he is in jail now, and the boy has burns all over his body. he is full of joy.
one of the day workers at the hope center told me about his experience during the war today. it was the first time that a local had really opened up to me about what actually personally happened to them so far. some of the things he shared with me are too grusome to share on here...but friends, let me tell you that most of us have no idea what kind of evil and tragedy has happened to the people here. i dont understand how these people have been able to rebuild and continued on with their lives. they have so much faith, and so much trust that God will provide and be their strength. i love that they dont just call him God here. it is always, "Papa God."
my heart is alive, and i am inspired daily by these people in my life.
Monday, August 22, 2011
limelight.
a week and a half in, and of course (like most new places that you start to get comfortable with), it feels like ive been living on this boat for a couple months...i actually know my way around a little bit better, i have friends to sit with at meals, and im actually beginning to learn my way around town a little bit. like a really little bit. needless to say, each day has its own adventures :)
i want to write about all the excursions that ive been on over the last few days exploring around, but that isnt really what my heart wants to tell you about tonight. or right now anyway, it may change by the time i finish writing what im thinking about...
so when i first started looking into mercy ships and getting to go to Africa, i had some pretty big dreams (day dreams, if you will). i had high hopes and expectations of getting to go to Africa, living on this amazing ship and going to the front lines, saving the lives of the poor and downtrodden (however you spell it...), with heroic sacrifice and stories of getting to help people recieve their sight again...the lame who were carried into the hospital would be walking out of the ship after surgery with me by their side, embracing me with a big African smile and thanking me in broken english for how i had changed their life.......in my mind, i would get to the ship, and i would be important. people would hear my stories and read my blog, and raise their eyebrows at how much i had done on my trip, and the great things i had done with my life. i had significance because of all i had done, and i would feel like a hero. i'd be in the limelight.
so i get here, and i am immediately immersed in a community of people on this ship of people who have been doing this for years, and years, and years. they have done thousands of surgeries, pulled thousands of teeth, taken out thousands of cataracts, fixed cleft palates, removed tumors, and helped people to walk for the first time in their life. people that have given up everything: their practice, western comforts, family, relationships, a normal life, to serve the poorest of the poor in the middle of west africa. nurses work tirelessly, sometimes through the night, the dentists pull anywhere from 60-100 teeth per day, per dentist. its hot, and humid, and rainy, and muggy, and smelly. these people are amazing. they are doing what God has called them to do in obedience, and using their skills to change people's lives.
continuing on...so i get here...not much certification. not much experience. more than ready for the importance and the heroics though (i can assure you). where is my placement? the galley. the kitchen. really?? easily the least recognized and least glamorous position on the ship. (now when i say "placement", its not all that that do by any means or stretch of the imagination- but when people ask me what i do on the ship, i tell them i work in the galley). i cut the meat, peel the ginger, pick worms out of the lettuce, wash the mangos, mop the floors, and whatever else may be on the menu for that day. when i first got here, i was trying to think of any way that i could get myself out of having to do this insignificant, un-limelighted job that i had been placed in. how was i suppose to have the heroic experiences that i had dreamed of for so long? i wanted to be featured on the mercy ships website holding the hand of a boy who used to have a giant tumor on has face but now looks normal! how was that suppose to happen while im CUTTING THESE ONIONS FOR BEEF STEW? but, in the midst of my minor temper tantrum, God spoke to me more than clearly-"james, was i not the one that made the way for you to be here? was i not the one that ordained this entire trip, this entire experience? did i not provide all of the money and funds (PLUS some) in order for you to be sitting where you are? do you think i am somehow letting your time here accidently slip out of my fingers? you are exactly where you are suppose to be. i love you, shut up."
something like that.
what have i learned here so far? that God is not impressed with heroism. he is not impressed with people who feel really important, or who have significance in the eyes of everyone around them. he just wants our obedience. the maxillo-facial surgeons, just as much as the galley workers, have been commanded to be obedient in the areas that they have been placed. period.
i am beginning to learn that i am going to have PLENTY of time with the patients, PLENTY of time doing ministry, and more than enough time to do about a thousand other things available for crew to get involved in on the ship. i just pray that God would continue to show me exactly what i am suppose to be doing with that time, and to be obedient to every.single.thing. he tells me to do, and to not be afraid to do a job that will get no applause, no thanks, and no recognition, and to do it with obedience and joy in my heart. i cannot believe i have the honor of getting to be apart of this amazing ministry and most of all, that i have the honor of getting to serve such an amazing God. thank you Jesus for being so patient with me.
more to come very soon about some adventures ive gotten to go on recently. but for now, its time for bed. getting up in a few hours to starting making lunch for about 500 of my infinitely hungry crew mates :)
love you all. please keep praying for me. i need Him so much.
james
i want to write about all the excursions that ive been on over the last few days exploring around, but that isnt really what my heart wants to tell you about tonight. or right now anyway, it may change by the time i finish writing what im thinking about...
so when i first started looking into mercy ships and getting to go to Africa, i had some pretty big dreams (day dreams, if you will). i had high hopes and expectations of getting to go to Africa, living on this amazing ship and going to the front lines, saving the lives of the poor and downtrodden (however you spell it...), with heroic sacrifice and stories of getting to help people recieve their sight again...the lame who were carried into the hospital would be walking out of the ship after surgery with me by their side, embracing me with a big African smile and thanking me in broken english for how i had changed their life.......in my mind, i would get to the ship, and i would be important. people would hear my stories and read my blog, and raise their eyebrows at how much i had done on my trip, and the great things i had done with my life. i had significance because of all i had done, and i would feel like a hero. i'd be in the limelight.
so i get here, and i am immediately immersed in a community of people on this ship of people who have been doing this for years, and years, and years. they have done thousands of surgeries, pulled thousands of teeth, taken out thousands of cataracts, fixed cleft palates, removed tumors, and helped people to walk for the first time in their life. people that have given up everything: their practice, western comforts, family, relationships, a normal life, to serve the poorest of the poor in the middle of west africa. nurses work tirelessly, sometimes through the night, the dentists pull anywhere from 60-100 teeth per day, per dentist. its hot, and humid, and rainy, and muggy, and smelly. these people are amazing. they are doing what God has called them to do in obedience, and using their skills to change people's lives.
continuing on...so i get here...not much certification. not much experience. more than ready for the importance and the heroics though (i can assure you). where is my placement? the galley. the kitchen. really?? easily the least recognized and least glamorous position on the ship. (now when i say "placement", its not all that that do by any means or stretch of the imagination- but when people ask me what i do on the ship, i tell them i work in the galley). i cut the meat, peel the ginger, pick worms out of the lettuce, wash the mangos, mop the floors, and whatever else may be on the menu for that day. when i first got here, i was trying to think of any way that i could get myself out of having to do this insignificant, un-limelighted job that i had been placed in. how was i suppose to have the heroic experiences that i had dreamed of for so long? i wanted to be featured on the mercy ships website holding the hand of a boy who used to have a giant tumor on has face but now looks normal! how was that suppose to happen while im CUTTING THESE ONIONS FOR BEEF STEW? but, in the midst of my minor temper tantrum, God spoke to me more than clearly-"james, was i not the one that made the way for you to be here? was i not the one that ordained this entire trip, this entire experience? did i not provide all of the money and funds (PLUS some) in order for you to be sitting where you are? do you think i am somehow letting your time here accidently slip out of my fingers? you are exactly where you are suppose to be. i love you, shut up."
something like that.
what have i learned here so far? that God is not impressed with heroism. he is not impressed with people who feel really important, or who have significance in the eyes of everyone around them. he just wants our obedience. the maxillo-facial surgeons, just as much as the galley workers, have been commanded to be obedient in the areas that they have been placed. period.
i am beginning to learn that i am going to have PLENTY of time with the patients, PLENTY of time doing ministry, and more than enough time to do about a thousand other things available for crew to get involved in on the ship. i just pray that God would continue to show me exactly what i am suppose to be doing with that time, and to be obedient to every.single.thing. he tells me to do, and to not be afraid to do a job that will get no applause, no thanks, and no recognition, and to do it with obedience and joy in my heart. i cannot believe i have the honor of getting to be apart of this amazing ministry and most of all, that i have the honor of getting to serve such an amazing God. thank you Jesus for being so patient with me.
more to come very soon about some adventures ive gotten to go on recently. but for now, its time for bed. getting up in a few hours to starting making lunch for about 500 of my infinitely hungry crew mates :)
love you all. please keep praying for me. i need Him so much.
james
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